-Dr. Robert Holden
I've said similar things from this quote to myself. I would like to pinpoint that it all began in college, but that's incorrect. I think I was born with the wanting to be the best. I remember striving constantly for my teacher's approval all the way back to my kindergarten days. I wanted to be the first one to "win" an M&M because I brought in a current events article.
I told myself I'd be happier when I got that M&M.
College allowed many more chances for my feelings to perpetuate. I told myself I'd be happier when I got an A on my paper. I thought I'd be happier once I'm done with school. I was absolutely sure I'd be happier once I got my first job. Then, when I got that job, I thought I'd be happier when I found an even better paying one.
When would it stop?
It didn't. And it still hasn't. I've suffered from destination addiction my entire life...so far.
What about you?
Our yoga teacher training instructor brought up a fantastic point in training this last weekend that tied in with my addiction. She mentioned so much of this world is trying to "keep up with the Joneses". It seems we are all wanting MORE. Many of us are walking around with this belief that if we get this, that, or the other thing, then we'll truly be happy.
But will we be? Really?
Something that struck me, and has struck me more and more as I've practice yoga and progressed through teacher training, is that we are already perfect, deep inside, and we can be happy. Right now. We're not born perfect. We'll probably never get truly perfect. But, we all are beautiful. We're just diamonds in the rough. All we have to do is peel the layers away that drag us down, that hide our spark.
Yoga has helped many people to feel more beautiful, to peel away those layers. After class, they feel more whole, more centered. A better version of themselves.
I think this can be carried into the lives of those who've tried yoga but it hasn't done the same for them. It doesn't matter that you don't like yoga. In fact, it's good you know what you don't like! It's SO much better to know what doesn't work than to keep trying something you want so badly to work, but it never, ever will. That can be frustrating.
Really, you just need to find what makes you, YOU. The ultimate version of yourself. The you you've always wanted to be. You can be that you, right now! You just have to find your thing. And, when you find it, you have to just do it. Do it, no matter what, so that you can be the best version of yourself. Then, you won't need anything. You won't need something in the future. You won't be happier when you accomplish that one lofty thing that's out there, somewhere in your fantasies, that you cannot grasp just yet. Your happiness doesn't come from that. It comes from you, being yourself and doing your thing, now.
Forget about the world and its expectations. Forget about the Joneses...whoever the heck they are. Forget that you need to be running around, searching for what you need, that you need to have everything that the world says you absolutely must have right now at this very moment. Or ELSE. Or else what? On all that, I call bull crap.
Because that's what it is - complete and utter crap...just...DRIVEL. You don't need ANYTHING. You only need yourself to be happy. And, you can only obtain happiness from yourself! You just have to believe it. Know it. Know you can be happy. Know you deserve to be happy.
I am not saying to completely forget about others. By all means, cultivate and nurture your relationships. Help others - those you love and those you respect, as much as you can, as often as you can.
But...only by taking care of yourself can you become the best version of you. The others in your life will appreciate that! Those closest to you LOVE to see you take care of yourself!
The way to become the best version of yourself is to do what you want to do. Do what makes you feel good. Maybe it's yoga. Maybe it's running. Maybe it's crocheting. Maybe it's playing Magic the Gathering. Maybe you love your job. (And you are darn lucky if you do! Heck, if you love something that's not your job...look for ways for it to become your job!) Bottom line is that it doesn't matter. Just do your thing, whatever it is. Do with WITHOUT apologizing. Do it with conviction. And, do it whenever you can. Because you deserve to be at your best. You deserve to be happy. Right now.
Who cares what everyone else is doing? All that matters is that it makes you happy.
I LOVE it when people find their "thing". Obviously, my thing is yoga...and baking cookies...and singing...and reading steampunk novels with large words in them. My husband's thing is board games. My mother's thing is downhill skiing. My mother-in-law's thing is painting. When we do these things, we feel real. We feel whole. We feel happy.
When you know what works for you...shine on, you crazy diamond!
Sarah
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