We're all imperfect. So, how is that perfect?

This weekend of yoga teacher training was very stressful for some of the students because a few of us performed our "yoga finals." This means we were to teach our very first one hour class to the rest of the students. It was, basically, the culmination of everything we had learned in our yoga teacher training, performed in its entirety, in front of everyone, for the very first time. 

It. Was. Terrifying!

I was one of the yogis who taught. My heart raced crazily in the moments leading up to my "yoga final". Earlier in the week, as I was practicing my routine (in my room, alone, to my closet doors, ha!), I had started to feel somewhat nervous, especially at times when I messed up the words I wanted to say or I forgot little "nuggets" of wisdom I'd written down. I practiced again to make sure I didn't forget them, and that helped some of the nervousness subside. 

When the big day came, I was feeling pretty confident. Several of the other students asked me if I was nervous, and I told them that I wasn't, and I was telling them the truth. As the other students rolled out their mats and as the instructor turned up the heat in the studio in preparation for practice, I suddenly felt paralyzed. Exhilarated. Afraid. I was definitely NOT feeling the way I do when practicing yoga! In that moment, I tried to center myself and to convince myself I would be just fine as I knew how hard I had worked during the week. But, WOW. That stress was SO overwhelming! 

As I began teaching, my heart still pumped hard in my chest and I knew my breaths were short. I wondered if any of the other students actually noticed. After teaching through a few sequences, however, and realizing that I could do what I had been working on all week, I started to feel calmer. I was, however, on a scale of 1-10, at about a 5 or 6 on the stress scale at any given moment. Also, I'll be honest. It wasn't perfect. It went well, and I was happy with how it turned out, and I received a plethora of positive feedback, but there were a few things I know I will want to work on for the next time I teach. 

As the other students taught their classes to the rest of us, I noticed several things. The first was that they were ALL nervous in the moments leading up to their classes - exactly as I had been. They too wished to do well. I don't doubt they wanted their performance to be perfect, just as I did. I also noticed, as they were teaching, that they may have missed a cue or pose or they apologized when they tripped over their words. As I noticed these things, though, I realized very quickly that they were trying so very, VERY hard in those moments where things weren't perfect. I also noticed this, too. I saw that their hearts were truly in the teaching. They were so beautiful to me in their imperfection because I knew EXACTLY how they felt. 

If the other students are reading this, I hope that you know this: I loved EVERYTHING about all of your classes because you were all growing and trying. There was NO WAY on this planet that our classes could have been perfect! What class is? What teacher is? NO ONE and NO CLASS is! Isn't that just so totally wonderful to know? 

What is even more exciting and comforting to me is that every single class that was taught this weekend was enjoyable. I was so proud of all of us for all the work we had done. We had all performed beautifully and earnestly. I find it so silly that any of us may have been unhappy with any little slip up that may have happened. 

There was simply no need for any of the student performances to be perfect. They were wonderful anyway!

In arriving to these thoughts, I was reminded of an article I'd read recently about how we can be happy in all aspects of our lives, even in our imperfections. The author, Kim Manfredi, wrote, "Here are five ways to embrace imperfection, to help you realize the perfect being that you truly are:

1. Love your imperfect body. This is where the heart lives."

She states here that because she broke her spine when she was 18 and practices yoga, she is more able to assist others who have back issues as well when she teaches her yoga classes. She also is more empathetic to those who suffer from other injuries or ailments. This, in turn, creates more compassion her practice and her teaching.

"2. Have fun with your imperfect mind. This is where freedom lives."

She says here that she, at one time, had become proficient at judging herself. When she learned to embrace the imperfections not only in her body but also in her thinking, she felt freer. She decided she was good enough and that the negative thoughts were limiting her. 

"3. Be imperfect in action. This is where the ability to help others lives."

Here, she emphasizes that every single day there is the possibility that we may mess up. Mistakes are made, but that doesn't mean we can't get back up on our figurative horses and give it another go! Our own mistakes help us help others who may make the same ones. When we share in those mistakes, we become closer.

"4. Be imperfect in speech. This is where inspiration lives."

This particular point ties in very well with our "yoga finals" this weekend. No one said everything they wanted to perfectly, but that was totally OK because our classes were excellent anyway! Besides, Kim states: "If I said everything perfectly, then what would be left to share?" Isn't that just so true?

"5. Enjoy your imperfect life. This is where happiness lives."

Kim says here that we are all broken. No one's life is perfect. Also, nothing is ever as it seems. No matter what the situation, it could always be worse. Always. Look for joy in your life, because there is good in every situation. 

This last point also resonates with the situation the other students and I faced this weekend. I got the impression that some of them felt the same way I did when they were done teaching their "yoga final" - that they could have done better. However, none of us really could have done any better than the way we did. This is because each class was a reflection of the student who was teaching. Each class was so dramatically and fabulously different because it was taught by women who were trying very hard to be themselves, teaching something they loved to others, who they wished to perform well for. Just the fact that they tried, practiced, and downright did it, makes the experience of it a perfect one.

Excellent job this weekend, ladies!

Sarah

(Excerpts are from http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-17019/how-to-be-imperfect-still-perfectly-happy.html)