What is the point?

Some days I just wake up CRANKAAAY. Maybe, the night before, I had a fierce argument with my husband. Or, during the day, I get thrown into a bad mood after I got a nasty complaint at work. As optimistic as I usually seem, bad moods and bad times do happen to me! They happen to all of us...unfortunately.


What do we do when we want to deal with these bad times? We reach for something to heal us. Recently, I had gotten off a particularly bad phone call while on my lunch break, and I thought I deserved to treat myself to some Starbucks to help lift my mood. I ordered at the window and pulled up to pay. As I handed over my debit card, the barista said, "No need! The person ahead of you paid for your coffee!"


I just about pissed my pants. I was OVERWHELMED with the kindness the person ahead of me had shown me. And they had ZERO idea about the terrible day I was having. They just did it.


But, gosh dangit, if only I would have been able to hug that person before they drove away so I could thank them from the bottom of my heart that they turned my day completely around!


I was reminded of this when our instructor for yoga school this past weekend said that we may never know the result of the gifts we give to the universe. When we're a teacher, our words may impact our students positively, but we'll never really know for sure. (Unless the students let us know, of course.) Our words might simply connect with a student on that particular day. There's also the chance that our words were felt so deeply by the student that the student carried those words for the rest of their life!


Her saying this made me SUPER excited to start teaching! I thought back to some of my favorite yoga classes and how the teacher was especially motivating to me or said a story, quote, or mantra that really resonated with me. I bet those teachers would love to know what they said inspired me. I know when I'm a teacher, I'd love to know if my words impacted anyone in a wonderful way.


What I find interesting, though, is we don't necessarily have to be any specific or specialized kind of teacher in order to share gifts, tell stories, or do random acts of kindness to others in our world.


Consider the last time you gave someone someone something. Maybe it was simply a smile to a stranger or a compliment to a co-worker. Heck, I'm still blown away every time a guy I don't even know holds a door open for me. It just makes me feel so special.


The truth is, some of the time, we never know the result of our good deed. (And now to talk about what I meant by the title of this blog entry!) What is the point of giving if we have no idea it'll be well received or we get nothing back? What if that stranger never smiles back? What if that co-worker thought we were just trying to butter them up? What if that guy had held the door open for another woman, and she slapped him in the face because she thought he was being condescending?


What is the point of giving anything without getting something in return? Or even something negative in return? Why go to the trouble?


I think...wait. I KNOW that there is something gained for simply GIVING.


How do I know? Well, I give compliments out to people like it's what I'm paid to do for a living! And...I couldn't really care less what the person I'm paying the compliment to says. (Though I certainly HOPE they like the compliment!) Believe it or not, it's actually never as if I'm trying to get on someone's good side. I just usually see something I like about a person and I tell them immediately about that.


Why is this? It's simply a personality trait of mine. There's a book titled The Five Love Languages, and one of the languages is Verbal Affirmations. That is my love language to the CORE. What's interesting about these love languages is that...usually....the language we use most towards everyone else is usually the way we wish to receive love in return. If you've ever given me a compliment, you KNOW how extremely grateful I am for it even if it's only the smallest little thing you mention. So, if you're reading this and you've complimented me, THANK YOU!!! You've given me the love that I seek. I bet you didn't even know it!


I do realize that my giving is a little self-fulfilling because I know, inside, that I give out compliments to others simply because I wish to get some in return. Even still, giving them out makes me a little happier anyway, even if I don't get back as many as I give out.  I still feel joy just to give people compliments, because whenever I'm the receiver of a compliment, I'm instantly happier.



I hope that you feel a little bit of happiness whenever you give someone something, too. Even if you don't get a response or something back, you're still putting joy out into the world. The point isn't necessarily to get something in return. The point is to make the world a better place.



Another way to realize what sort of impact your giving - without expectation of receiving - actually can have, consider this. What if that stranger you smiled at while walking was on their way home because they were going to commit suicide?



Really...what if?



And, what if you smiling at them made them think a little bit harder about what they were doing?



Seriously. What if?



That is the point of giving. You'll never know what your gift did. But it sure did a hell of a lot for the world.



It was simply a gift to me that you read this post. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.



Sarah